Mid-afternoon thought break...

Swimming lessons, business trips, playdates, doctor's appointments, sports camp, piles of laundry and dishes..that's what's been happening at the Albritton's this week. I've enjoyed the busy pace, although I'm behind on housework. Michael and the kids don't enjoy it nearly as much as I do. They would much rather stay home and play. I understand that. They're still really young to go and do as much as we do. So we're working on a balance. We have managed to not eat out once this week. I've fixed lunch and supper every day. Hopefully our wallet and waistlines will see the difference!

I've been contemplating my career as a stay home mom. Not because I have nothing better to do, but because it comes up in conversation a lot. I've been told by lots of people, "you should be so thankful that you get to be with them all day." Now I know all of the strangers in Walmart who tell me this will not be reading this blog...but I'm saying it to those who do: I am so thankful. My life is my children. They are not my identity, but they are the focus of all I do right now. I am grateful for my sweet husband who is willing to work really hard so we can live on one salary. He never really wanted to go back into engineering, but he did in order for me to be here. We don't do or buy a lot of things other people have in order for me to be home, but God has taught me so much through that. It's amazing what I really don't need!

But I do have rough days. My kids are 5, 3 and 1. They are still mostly dependent on me for everything. I spend all of my awake time doing what they need or want me to do. I'm not a pushover, they just need a lot! I'm teaching them to do things for themself, but that means there's a lot of messes to clean up after them. So not much else gets done. My leisure time is usually filled with guilty feelings for leaving them (I do this to myself, Michael is great about this), but I know I have to do a few things without them. When I'm with my kids, I try to spend a lot of time talking, playing, laughing and teaching. Because I know that when they go to school, or anywhere they are not with me, how they behave is a direct reflection on what I do every day. So I have to be mentally "on" at all times, and that is very draining! Right now, Aidan wants to play on the computer, and the girls are asleep. I'm talking to him about taking turns as I type!

So I am thankful. I love their faces, their dance moves, their laughs, their artwork, their "contraptions" that they love to make, their jokes, their movie quotes, their hugs and kisses, their snuggles and so much more. I'm so glad I get to be a part of who they're becoming. I see so much promise in my kids, and I pray every day that God will manifest Himself in their little hearts and they will know his perfect love and acceptance and never look for it anywhere else. I didn't want 3 kids this soon. I didn't see this for myself. I confess I'm worried about when I do go to work, what on earth will I do? But right now, I'm where God wants me to be. It's a crazy life. I have done nothing to deserve such great kids, but God has been more than gracious to me. All I can do in return is praise him with everything I do.